The Five Love Languages… Yay or Nay?

I’m sure at some point you’ve heard about the 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman or even gave the quiz ( a try to figure out what yours is and those around you. If not, let me give you a quick 101.

The 5 Love Languages developed by Dr. Chapman are:

Words of Affection, Physical Touch, Quality Time, Acts of Service and Receiving Giving. Each one is there to help us understand how one expresses and receives love, which is what we ultimately want is to feel and be loved, right.

I recently learnt that it’s important to take the time and have an open conversation about how each one wants to feel loved.

Discovering each other’s primary love language and speaking that language regularly creates a better understanding of each other's needs and support each other's growth.

Even love can sometimes get lost in translation when two people speak different love languages therefore this too can help grow and transform relationships, taking them further, creating a deeper bond.

But, and this is a big one, a relationship is a place for transformation and growth so when we limit each other with a specific love language, we do not allow room for change.

Our love languages are not there for a quick fix or a false sense of connection with someone. They should be used as a guide line, to just lay the foundation. So the point I am trying to make is that, love languages are a useful tool to improve how we communicate and express ourselves, but they shouldn't be the be-all-and-end-all solution for happiness.

Instead a starting point that sets any form of relationship on a journey to meet each other in a more vulnerable and real way. But just like everything in life it’ll take work, understanding and compassion.


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